existential tension ;; ren's storage

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*:･ﾟ✦ RENEGADEANTHEM MORTEM

—— though my eyes could see i still was a blind man *:･ﾟ✦

name renegadeanthem mortem
— nicknames ren, renny (delilah), renegade
— past names cavalrychoir relios
— name meaning ren decided to change his name from cavalrychoir to renegadeanthem because he was looking for a fresh start. but he felt as though changing it to something completely different would be his own way of trying to forget everything he's done, every crime he's committed. so although he changed his name, he kept the connotation and the correlation of something powerful (cavalry and renegade) and paired it with a song-like suffix (choir and anthem). his new name, renegadeanthem, is also a way he views himself. he went against his tribe and everything they taught him (this is where the renegade aspect of his name comes in). when choosing this name, he was in a dark time in his life, not knowing who he was, where he wanted to go, who he wanted to be and how to better himself, if he even could better himself. the 'anthem' aspect of his name doubled as a pick-me-up as well as a reminder of "his song." what he means by this is this is the song in his heart, it defines who he is even if he himself isn't sure exactly what it is. we all have a "song" and this one is his.
— pronunciation ren-ee-gayd an-th-em
sex male
— gender cismale
— pronouns he, him, his
age thirty-two months / two years, eight months
— mentally thirty-two months / two years, eight months
— spiritually thirty-two months / two years, eight months
— how old do they look twenty-five months / two years, one month
— d.o.b april tenth
— star sign aries
— birthplace a tribe that no longer exists (npc group)
species eurasian lynx / demon
— ethnicity x
— accent x
rank member
— do they like their rank? he doesn't mind it. a bit scared of holding any position of power in fear it may go to his head and he reverts back to his old self.
— previous ranks chaser [shp], guardsman [hp]

height 2.5ft (30in / 76.2cm) tall at shoulders, 3.2ft (38.4in / 97.54cm) in total
weight 67lbs (30.4kg)
primary eye colour dull dark red
— eye colour details around the pupil is a fiery orange
skin colour snowy white
— skin colour details x
— blemishes and birthmarks x
— scars there are scars all over his body due to previous fights
fur colour dark grey
— colour details he has black lynx markings as well as white dots present in some of those markings
— texture thick and not exactly coarse, but not soft either. his fur is built to keep him warm and keep water and cold out
— length short
body type large, muscular, license to kill
— posture militant, proper, professional
— disabilities/handicaps x
— illnesses/diseases x
detailed appearance starting from the top, ren has a pair of slender ears with white tuffs atop them, a trademark of the lynx species; the base of the ears are slightly rounded. A broad face with dull (a reflection of his mental and emotional state; will liven with further development), dark red eyes and a feiry orange encircling black pupils. The orange is a bit hard to notice, but even harder to forget when acknowledged as they hold a certain defiance that doesn't seem to match his overall stoic, professional and militant appearance. Continuing on, he has an ashen coloured nose as well as short white whiskers that sprout from his muzzle; with every whisker, there is a black dot on his fur where a whisker is. Bits of white are sprinkled on his features here and there, most noticeably above his eyes where his eyebrows would be. A white ">" looking symbol could be spotted where his brows would be as well as a a medium length diagonal white line that starts from the middle of the forehead (pointing towards the ears respectively) before traveling down towards his eyes where it stops between them. Under his eyes as well are white lines that bring out his eyes. Black lines places atop his eyes give the illusion of longer eyes and eyelashes as well as black lines that start on either end of the eye and flow down towards his cheek. These lines stop about midway down the cheek and really round out his face. Continuing on to his overall build, he is built for combat. A natural born fighter, one man army and battle-ready, toned muscles ripple under his fur with every step.
— faceclaim
— reference(s) [ x ]
aesthetic dark colours, knives, uniforms, fangs, claws, forests
— accessory(ies) x

positive traits strong-willed, courageous, diligent, humble, selfless, encouraging
neutral traits reliant, just, independent, decisive, distant, curious, chaotic, protective
negative traits distrusting, cold, malicious, borderline barbaric, brutish, unforgiving
mental disorders x
— mental tick(s) x
mbti type ISTJ / logistician
— enneagram type type five / the investigator
— alignment chaotic neutral
— house gryffindor
— faction dauntless
detailed personality As far as personality goes, Ren is very brutish and malicious. He finds no enjoyment in taking the easy way out and instead fancies a challenge. He's a bit hardcore and militant as he was raised to essentially be a killing machine. He doesn't like taking other's life despite being trained to do so though if push comes to shove, he has no problems with it. Someone has to do it, right? However, if the individual they have to kill is a good sport and puts up a good fight, Ren is more than willing to let them go. A good fight does not go appreciated by the battle-ready male. Being both a sword and shield, the bulky feline is cold and distant, never warming up to anyone as he has serious trust issues that one would never guess he has due to how he engages in conversation. As mentioned, he is brutish - borderline barbaric - and is ambitious, but that doesn't mean a more tender side of him doesn't surface when conversing with another. However, when it comes to speaking with others, he enjoys learning more and understanding topics he is unaware about. This side of him is softened to a much greater extent when speaking with or being around children. He still maintains his cold and distant ways, but he has a gentler undertone with boundless patience. As for adults, they don't get that luxury. With older individuals, Ren expects them to be well-informed and trained enough to hold their own. Any sort of weakness is not an option. Well, rephrasing that- everyone has flaws and weaknesses, he understands that. But those who know this and are not willing to improve don't have his respect. The best improvement is self improvement after all.

Continuing on, Ren, though rough around the edges himself, does his best to encourage others in his own way. Giving up is out of the question and if he has to live on this fucking sorry-ass planet then so the fuck do you. He gets agitated when others speak poorly about themselves and would do what he can to lift their spirits once more. He's a hard nut to crack but once it's done, one will realize he isn't a nut at all. Instead, he's more like candy with a gooey center. He has a lovely sense of humour and a just as lovely (singing) voice. He's a tough guy with strong values and even stronger muscles. Though, with that being said, he finds difficulty in forming relationships that are even remotely positive because of what he was taught as a young child and the things he was exposed to (where he grew up, love and affection was a strategic tool rather than a genuine feeling). Because of this, Ren develops crushes rather easily. Though, because of his lack of experience and the values that had been drilled into his mind as a child (trust no one, everyone is an enemy, the world is cruel, the weak are preyed on by the strong, the weak are there to be ruled by the strong, with power comes security etc.) he denies it and himself of any positive relationship because such a thing only exists in fairytales in his mind.

Because of the lack of love in his life, Ren had grown to be more or less what his clan had wanted him to be. Save for a couple traits that he manifested on his own due to a strong mind and a relatively okay moral compass (compared to those he lived with, he is the least violent). But, for the sake of answering a hypothetical question, let's say an individual manages to break through to Ren and somehow gain his friendship. What then? Well, nothing but sunshine and rainbows, truthfully. He'll be much more tame with them and to him, their word is taken above all else. If they asked him to jump, he'll ask 'how high?' He would go through great lengths to make them smile and laugh and would be significantly nicer to this special individual. He would be their sword and shield and theirs only. He would conquer Heaven, Earth and Hell for this person(s) (though he'd do all of this even without a special individual to tell him to) and would hurt anyone who dared raise a hand to them. His short coat is thick and soft which makes him perfect for snuggling and any sort of physical contact - something he would be no stranger to. Best believe he would be at this individual's side when they're sick, taking care of them tirelessly until they're well once more. He'd take extreme pride in being able to be apart of their life and continuously wonder why they, an amazing person, would chose to be lovers/friends/adopted siblings/etc. with him.
likes Strength ;; organization ;; solitude ;; gentle kisses ;; autumn ;; running ;; swimming ;; kids ;; teaching ;; cheesy jokes ;; dark colours ;; scented candles ;; rock/metal music ;; blood ;; sharp objects ;; dawn ;; thunderstorms ;; sweets.
dislikes Crying ;; violence ;; having to repeat himself ;; being ignored ;; spring ;; summer ;; winter ;; "weaklings" ;; being underestimated ;; scary movies.
— fear(s)/phobia(s) x
habits Plays with his paws when he feels awkward ;; jumps to conclusions ;; has a "shoot now, aim later" mindset
strengths Combat ;; strength ;; endurance ;; stamina ;; encouraging (in his own way) ;; adaptive ;; humble
weaknesses Understanding social cues ;; anything remotely social ;; easily angered ;; self-destructive ;; has no self-esteem ;; unforgiving ;; vengeful

physical health 100%
— physical strength 100%
mental health 59%
— mental strength 78%
emotional health 68%
— emotional strength 95%

generation one
— reincarnated? no
parents npc xx npc
— figuratively x
— adopted x
— other influences x
siblings npcs
— figuratively x
— adopted x
best friend(s) delilah
— friend(s) x
archenemy x
— enemy(ies) x

romantic attraction Panromantic
sexual attraction Pansexual
current status Dating Delilah
— level of difficulty to impress Hard to challenging
— at the moment, are they interested in dating? Very much. The thought of giving himself wholly to another is a dream of his, but he doesn't trust himself not to hurt them
— are they actively looking for a romantic partner? No
— what do they look for in a romantic partner? Ren isn't picky when it comes to traits he's interested in. They just have to treat him right and have a somewhat decent moral compass.
turn-ons
turn-offs
brownie points

this or that?
— lover or fighter? Fighter
— pop or rock music? Rock
— singing or dancing? Singing
— outdoors or indoors? Indoors
— shy or outgoing? Outgoing
— coffee or tea? Coffee
— introvert or extrovert? Introvert
— monogamous or polyamorous? Both
— hugging or kissing? Hugging
— fiction or non-fiction? Fiction
— morning or night? Night
— head or heart? Head

what is their opinion on...
— spirituality? Considering he's a demon, he doesn't think he really has a right to say anything. If that's what someone wants to believe then more power to them.
— settling down and having a family? Ren would love to settle down and start a family of his own. He would love his family with all his heart and treasure them more than anything in the known universe. However, with his current mental and emotional state, he feels he isn't ready to have children yet.
— their own family? He despises them and everything they've done. He's killed them with his own hands so there's no point in thinking about them anymore.
— death? He doesn't fear death. But he's not going to go down without a fight either.
— long distance relationships? Ren definitely wouldn't be able to uphold a long distance relationship for long. Best know he'll be packing his bags and on the first flight to his partner in the morning.
— violence? Violence has been a huge part of his life and a part of his life he's not proud of. He was bred in violence and encouraged to spread it. If he can avoid it, he will.

what is their favourite...
— season? Autumn
— color(s)? Dark colours
— activity? Anything with Delilah
— setting? Anywhere with Delilah
— song (hypothetically)? anything five finger death punch, but if he had to choose one, "under and over it".

[align=center][div style="border-width:0px; width: 60%; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; font-size: 8pt; line-height: 150%;word-spacing:-1px;"]&& Basics
— Renegadeanthem Mortem (??) ;; "Ren", "Renegade" ;; "Renny" and/or "Rene" for the select few
— Cismale ;; Masculine pronouns ;; He, him, his
— Six years and five months (seventy-seven months) ;; Born April 10th
. Ages realistically/whenever I feel
. Aries
. Physical appearance doesn't excel twenty-five months
. Immortal
. Created June 14th
— Tanglewood
. Member
. Previously a Guardsman [hp]
. Previously a loner
&& Appearance
— Eurasian Lynx [birth / main] ;; mental health: 80% ;; physical health: 100% ;; ref.
. detailed appearance
&& Personality
— mbti ;; archtype ;; trope ;; trope ;; trope
. As far as personality goes, Ren is very brutish and malicious. He finds no enjoyment in taking the easy way out and instead fancies a challenge. He's a bit hardcore and militant as he was raised to essentially be a killing machine. He doesn't like taking other's life despite being trained to do so though if push comes to shove, he has no problems with it. Someone has to do it, right? However, if the individual they have to kill is a good sport and puts up a good fight, Ren is more than willing to let them go. A good fight does not go appreciated by the battle-ready male. Being both a sword and shield, the bulky feline is cold and distant, never warming up to anyone as he has serious trust issues that one would never guess he has due to how he engages in conversation. As mentioned, he is brutish - borderline barbaric - and is ambitious, but that doesn't mean a more tender side of him doesn't surface when conversing with another. However, when it comes to speaking with others, he enjoys learning more and understanding topics he is unaware about. This side of him is softened to a much greater extent when speaking with or being around children. He still maintains his cold and distant ways, but he has a gentler undertone with boundless patience. As for adults, they don't get that luxury. With older individuals, Ren expects them to be well-informed and trained enough to hold their own. Any sort of weakness is not an option. Well, rephrasing that- everyone has flaws and weaknesses, he understands that. But those who know this and are not willing to improve don't have his respect. The best improvement is self improvement after all.

Continuing on, Ren, though rough around the edges himself, does his best to encourage others in his own way. Giving up is out of the question and if he has to live on this fucking sorry-ass planet then so the fuck do you. He gets agitated when others speak poorly about themselves and would do what he can to lift their spirits once more. He's a hard nut to crack but once it's done, one will realize he isn't a nut at all. Instead, he's more like candy with a gooey center. He has a lovely sense of humour and a just as lovely (singing) voice. He's a tough guy with strong values and even stronger muscles. Though, with that being said, he finds difficulty in forming relationships that are even remotely positive because of what he was taught as a young child and the things he was exposed to (where he grew up, love and affection was a strategic tool rather than a genuine feeling). Because of this, Ren develops crushes rather easily. Though, because of his lack of experience and the values that had been drilled into his mind as a child (trust no one, everyone is an enemy, the world is cruel, the weak are preyed on by the strong, the weak are there to be ruled by the strong, with power comes security etc.) he denies it and himself of any positive relationship because such a thing only exists in fairytales in his mind.

Because of the lack of love in his life, Ren had grown to be more or less what his clan had wanted him to be. Save for a couple traits that he manifested on his own due to a strong mind and a relatively okay moral compass (compared to those he lived with, he is the least violent). But, for the sake of answering a hypothetical question, let's say an individual manages to break through to Ren and somehow gain his friendship. What then? Well, nothing but sunshine and rainbows, truthfully. He'll be much more tame with them and to him, their word is taken above all else. If they asked him to jump, he'll ask 'how high?' He would go through great lengths to make them smile and laugh and would be significantly nicer to this special individual. He would be their sword and shield and theirs only. He would conquer Heaven, Earth and Hell for this person(s) (though he'd do all of this even without a special individual to tell him to) and would hurt anyone who dared raise a hand to them. His short coat is thick and soft which makes him perfect for snuggling and any sort of physical contact - something he would be no stranger to. Best believe he would be at this individual's side when they're sick, taking care of them tirelessly until they're well once more. He'd take extreme pride in being able to be apart of their life and continuously wonder why they, an amazing person, would chose to be lovers/friends/adopted siblings/etc. with him.
. positive traits include being strong-willed, courageous, diligent, humble, selfless (to a degree)
. neutral traits include being reliant, just, independent, decisive, distant, curious, chaotic
. negative traits include being distrusting, cold, malicious, borderline barbaric, brutish, unforgiving
&& Relationship
— [G1] Npc xx Npc
. Npc siblings ;; one brother, two sisters ;; killed them and his parents
— Children: x
— Friends: x
. Close friends: Delilah (??)
— Enemies: x
— Trusts: Delilah
— Adopted: x
— Panromantic ;; Pansexual
. Single
. In love with Delilah
  - Develops crushes easily though ignores them because he's Clueless and Inexperienced
  - Especially likes strong (physically, emotionally and/or mentally) characters
. Ex-husband to Delilah
. Not actively looking
. Medium-difficult to impress
. Challenging to get close to
— ½ --
&& Interaction
— Enhanced Senses (only for eyes and ears; cannot control very well), Mental bond (with Delilah), Conjuration, Fire elemental (cannot control very well), Clairvoyance
. Was given abilities by the demon he sold his soul to ;; Unaware of this and unaware of how to manifest them (also an excuse for me to give myself more time to get him powers lel) ;; Does not include fire abilities as those where given to him by Anatole
— Physically hard ;; Mentally medium ;; Will start fights if provoked ;; Won't end (other's) fights
— Open to minor injuries and plotting ;; Closed to death, maim, torture and major injuries
— Attack in darkred ;; Can powerplay nonviolent/peaceful acts
&& Miscellaneous
— Demon
— Low self-esteem
. But he will physically fight anyone who puts themselves down like no binch you are beautiful and perfect in your own way and I will fucking say it as many times as you need to understand that you little shiet
— Lovely (singing) voice
. Grows incredibly embarrassed if caught singing or is complimented on it ;; Renegadeanthem.EXE will stop working
— Shares his body with a fire deity known as Anatole
— Always ic opinions <3
— Updated 8/23

[align=center][div style="width:60%;font-family:arial;font-size:11px;text-align:justify;line-height:130%;word-spacing:-0.5px;letter-spacing:0.5px;"]VERY LARGE WIP ;; MORE INFORMATION NEEDS TO BE ADDED/CHANGED ;; EDIT LAYOUT

History-
Alright, so get this, Cav comes from this tribe-like group of creatures called (NAME HERE LMAO) and they're a rambunctious, barbaric group of savages. Trained killers and murders are applauded for their "hunts" and captures. They'd consume territory and dictate over those who were unable to protect themselves. They were a power-hungry lot who only cared about getting stronger and gaining more territory to call theirs. Torture sessions, public executions and humiliations as well as getting females outside of the group pregnant, only to kill her when she has the litter were second nature to young Cav. This was normal to him and he was encouraged to join them. He did once, detested it and for the sake of keeping up appearances, he hung to the back and avoided it when he had the chance.

Within the group, there are powerful (royal if you will) families that have a particularly strong genetics: Blackthorn, Thanok, Reilos, Osris, and Zilvenus. Cav belonged to the Relios family along with his father and mother being the head, his father's brother as his second in command and Cav's siblings: one brother, two sisters. His siblings and himself were relentlessly trained by both their parents and the others in their group and were only conceived to continue the Relios family. Never was their birth out of love and the genuine desire to raise children. To be born into these families or become the mate to a member of these families is a high honour given to only a select few. Cav was proud to be apart of this family despite all the wrongdoings they have committed. One of them being Cav's uncle getting a she-cat, Liliana, pregnant under the false pretense of love and taking her back with him to the group where she realized just what kind of situation she was in. Because of her relation with Cav's uncle, Cav was around her frequently and it didn't take long for the two to start talking. She was the first person to really care about him and she taught him about the wonderful world they lived in and the group he lived in was a disgusting and terrible one. Though she enjoyed stirring up trouble, she used the fact she was pregnant to her advantage and got away with many things as the group didn't want to harm the unborn children she carried. In the months she was pregnant, she and Cav developed a friendship built on mutual trust and compassion. It all soon ended when a couple days after she gave birth, she was executed after denying to join them. Despite young Cav standing in between her, the executioner and the crowd in attempt to reason with them, he was pushed to the side and held down as the session continued. He watched as she was killed with a defiant grin on her face.

Promptly after she was killed, Cav was punished by torture and starved for a week. His family members didn't even bat an eye at him nor did anyone show him as much compassion as Liliana did. After his punishment, he emerged a new person on the inside thanks to Liliana though continued his training as to not arise suspicion. Hatred for his group grew more with every passing day as he learned more about them and their ways of conduct. When he reached the age of fourteen months, he realized no one was going to change their ways as it seemed to be working effectively. That didn't make it right. So deciding to learn more about the world, Cav disappeared for a couple months. During his travels, he came across a good lot of individuals that he adapted good personality traits from. One of them being a kind demon whom Cav sold his soul for power. The demon also gave Cav abilities, but didn't tell him what they were or how to manifest them (also bc i need to buy them from the store but i'm broke so this gives me more time to accumulate the coin to get them) just because they liked him so much. Now using his newfound abilities, he went back to his group and slaughtered everyone after they still insist on not changing their ways. As for he children who were too young to understand anything, they were dropped off at various clans that Cav had come across. He was able to rid the world of the stain that is (GROUP NAME) but when he died, he would cease to be. He's a bit concerned about it, but he doesn't regret what he did.

Now a traveler, he'll come across Tanglewood and join them.

• okay but idea credit to candor so like siblings tried to kill him to get the rest of the inheritance/power
• this would be after he emerges from his punishment for speaking out against Liliana’s death
• they try to kill him countless of times but he manages just to barely escape their schemes with cuts and bruises
• he then caught on to their plan of killing him off for his share of the inheritance and decided to end things here and now
• as he attempted to reason with them (cos they’re his siblings and (SHE CAT) taught him how to show affection. He was still shit at it but at least he didn’t want to kill his siblings), they heavily wound him and leave him out to bleed to death
• the kind demon shows up and decides to help him
• she heals him ip reall nice n good and he’s thankful. Demon says no prob and Cal asks if he could join her on her travels. She agrees and they go explore the world together, meeting others along the way and adapting some of their personality traits
• after months of travel, cal decided to go home but not without a parting gift. Deciding to eradicate the people who raised him and the rest of his group, he sold his soul to his demon companion for an extra advantage in fights. The demon also gave him abilities but wasnt told what they were or how to manifest them
• parting ways, he headed back to his group to try and reason with them
• reasoning didn’t work so he slaughtered everyone shrug emoji
• now that he doesn’t have a place to go, he heading to tanglewood cos his demon companion told him it was a place he could join if he wanted to

[align=center][div style="width:60%;font-family:arial;font-size:11px;text-align:justify;line-height:130%;word-spacing:-0.5px;letter-spacing:0.5px;"]- First encounter with Delilah
- Joining Tanglewood
- Name change
- Delilah tells him her past
- Delilah's Death

- Ren's reintroduction // Coming clean to Delilah

[align=center][div style="width:60%;font-family:arial;font-size:11px;text-align:justify;line-height:130%;word-spacing:-0.5px;letter-spacing:0.5px;"]reserved for awards and titles

[align=center][div style="width:60%;font-family:arial;font-size:11px;text-align:justify;line-height:130%;word-spacing:-0.5px;letter-spacing:0.5px;"][spoiler=del+ren ;; by ririchiyo // thnx bby <33][/spoiler]
[spoiler=del+ren ;; by me][/spoiler]
[spoiler=ren ;; by me][/spoiler]
[spoiler=ren ;; updated appearance ;; by me][/spoiler]