VENGEFUL GENIE [twist a wish!]

[Star]

Rules are simple! The first person posts a wish of their own. The next person answers, twisting the wish to disadvantage the first poster, and then posts their own wish. If you're familiar with The Monkey's Paw, you'll already know how this works. Here's a short example though:

Brutus:
Genie, I wish I was rich!

---

Duncan:
Your name is now Rich... As in Richard.

I wish I was invisible.

---

Blaise:
You are now invisible and cannot reappear.

I wish for.... and so on...

The person that posts next can start us off. <3

oh generous genie, i wish that i could get my life back together

[Star]

The genie grants your wish, but all he can do is wrap you and flex tape then hope.

I wish I was a wizard.

granted; you are now orion the red, and you use your magic to turn objects red.

i wish i could drive with my knees.

[Star]

Your wish becomes true! You begin driving with your knees. As most would except, you aren't skilled with driving with your knees. Inevitably your seat is lowered to the floor. Seeing over the hood is impossible. A crash is practically unavoidable. Along with that, every time you pass a cop, you're pulled over and receive a ticket.

I wish I could shapeshift!

your wish has been granted. you are able to morph into any brand of fabric softener that you so desire.

i wish i could remember my social insurance number

[Star]

You remember your social insurance number on command but you're required to tell someone afterwards.

I wish I had no enemies.

granted. you've lost the ability to mentally perceive someone as an enemy or a friend, leaving you in a constant state of confusion and fear.

i wish i made a dollar every time that i ate a grain of rice.

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Granted. Instead of making dollars, a sand dollar appears before you each time you eat a grain of rice. Inevitably you must either stop eating rice or throw out the sand dollar each time due to their lack of any real monetary value.

I wish I could pay for my entire college tuition without having to work.

granted. you are now living in norway, which has free public university tuition.

i wish that lip balm worked for me